i live my life inside a dream {ozzie}

[CARLY BARRETT]

Carly Barrett was usually fine. She could usually keep up her walls and hide her downfalls and try to make people like her. And people usually would, and she would pretend not to hear anything bad about her. It helped that no one usually said it to her face because she surrounded herself with friends who would defend her if such a thing happened. So no one dared mess with her.

But on Twitter, no one could protect her from the words. They were there, she could see people replying to her tweets. She often would respond to the responses by favoriting or retweeting to maybe make someone's day, but that was only when they were positive.

When they were negative, she immediatley blocked the user, but the words still echoed in her head.

CARLY BARRETT shut up no one cares
CARLY BARRETT go kill urself
CARLY BARRETT just die you fat ugly ginger

And she would often slam her laptop shut with tears in her eyes and mascara beginning to run and smudge. Her eyes face would get red and puffy, and the makeup she wore wouldn't hide it. On instinct she would go to her mirror and notice how awful her face looked and how bad her makeup was and how fat she looked (mainly because her clothes had been wrinkled from sitting at her computer).

She would then shut the blinds if they were open, take of her clothes, go to her cloest, and put on pajamas, and lay down crying until she fell asleep. And she would stay in this funk for a few days, not eating or even moving.

But this time, Carly decided she wanted to talk to one of the only people who she could be this broken thing around. Someone who knew how she really truly felt.

So after she looked in the mirror, she wiped away her tears, saving them for later, held her chin up in the air, and went to her closet. She picked out something more casual than she normally wore but still fashionable enough to where no one would question it, and changed into it. In the mirror, she fixed her makeup to the perfection it was earlier. She kept calm the entire time so her face wouldn't be as red as it had been.

Then she covered her mirror and left the room, keeping her chin up and walking as she normally did through the corridors of the dorm rooms until she got to the boys section of the senior wing. It was instinct that carried her to that familiar door, and she raised a hand to knock before she paused and put her ear to the door, making sure he was alone. After deciding that he was, Carly stepped back and knocked on Ozzie Wager's door three times with as much class as she could manage.

[/justify]

{ outfit }

[OZZIE WAGERS]

Ozzie Wagers was perpetually happy.

He had the perfect girlfriend and amazing bros to pass the days with. His dad brought in decent money to support the two of them. Nothing in Ozzie's life was wrong, really, except that his mother had been killed when he was young. That shouldn't make too much of an impression on a teenage boy, right? Ozzie was about to graduate, after all, and everyone said he was always happy. The problem was, though, that Ozzie could be brought down so quickly.

Ozzie had never felt like he could talk to anyone about how weight-sensitive he was, either. That was unacceptable for a guy! Ozzie was an athlete and shouldn't have anything to worry about, anyways. If he got upset he should just man up and deal with it, right? Ozzie couldn't, though. His mother had been the one to be there for him and while he got along just fine with his father, there was no real emotional connection between them. Ozzie's coping abilities had been murdered just as his mother had been.

That was until he met Carly Barrett.

She was the person Ozzie could truly connect to and talk to. While Andie was his everything, there were certain aspects of himself he didn't want to uncover. She didn't need to see the ugly, raw sides of Ozzie Wagers. Addison was a motherly figure to him, despite being younger than he, but she could never replace Siobhan Wagers. So there had been a bit a hole in Ozzie's life, and Carly was more than capable of filling it. They were like brother and sister and comforted each other because no one else could quite understand their pain.

In a weird, telepathic way, Ozzie had a feeling she would be coming over. Maybe it was because when he went to find her on twitter, he saw nothing but ugly hate. He wanted nothing more than to reply back to every single one of them and tell them all to shut the fuck up and get a life, but as anyone who actually uses the internet knows, it's never smart to start an internet fight with an idiot. Ozzie made the effort to pull on some athletic shorts and a tshirt, since it would probably be a bit "uncouth" to be chilling in his boxers if/when Carly decided to stop by. For the rest of his day, though, Ozzie planned on watching cheesy movies on Netflix, specifically ones with Nicolas Cage because he essentially invented cheese. Seriously though, one day he was going to have to "cage" Andie's dorm. And film her reaction.

While finishing up "It Could Happen to You", Ozzie heard three firm knocks at his door. He shut his laptop to let Carly in, not particularly ashamed by his slightly blood shot eyes and messy hair. The minute the door opened, Ozzie's face scrunched up into a frown. He could read the pain on Carly like an open book, and he silently ushered her in. "Was it twitter?" This wasn't much of a question, as Ozzie knew it was social media. He sat on the edge of his bed, inviting her to sit next to him so he could wrap her up in a big Ozzie-grade bear hug. It hurt him to see Carly so upset, and he would do anything he could to put the pep back in her step.

[CARLY BARRETT]

Honestly, if it wasn't for Ozzie, she wouldn't have been able to handle it. It meaning everything, she supposed. These talks (well, they were mostly cries) kept her sane and she appreciated Ozzie and all he did, and all he was. She wouldn't have cared if he was in his boxers, she wouldn't have cared if he was wearing crocs. It was the one time that that was the last thing on her mind, appearances and fashion. At least, not in other people, since she did feel like she looked horrible.

Ozzie always looked great, anyways, so there.

Carly wished she was as happy as Ozzie was, because she was almost positive that Ozzie's happy was genuine, if fragile, while hers was a lie that was already torn when she put it on. In a way, she almost felt bad, since her pain and sadness wasn't backed by the loss of a parent. Her parents were both alive and well and living it up in Hollywood. But she tried not to think about that, since it always just spiraled into feeling worse about herseld.

As Ozzie opened the door with a frown, her heartbeat increased in speed with the thought that maybe Ozzie didn't want to see her, but some logical part of her that still remained told her that no, this was always his face when she arrived, because he was angry with the people who had made her this way. He ushered her in without a word and she sat next to him as per usual, awaiting his hug. She needed one like a fa-- like an addict needed crack.

"Y-yes," she said, her voice cracking, and she burst into tears again. Carly was so whiny sometimes, she hated it. Maybe if she wasn't, she wouldn't have this problem. She knew that it was fine to feel however she wanted, but... the parts of her were battling now, and it made it all the more confusing and made her cry into her hands even more.

She calmed down just a little bit, tears still streaming down her face. "I don't understand why people are so cruel..." She sniffled, then decided that sounded hypocritical. This was the one time she didn't have to be hypocritical. "I mean, I'm not the nicest person ever, but I wouldn't say anything like that to someone I've never even met..." Oh, she was making herself sound worse with every word! Carly sobbed again, working through all her emotions.

[/justify]

{ here's a sucky post for you }

{ btdubs the lyrics are from 'the state of dreaming' by marina & the diamonds }